aboutMiche

Dear Universe

2012-01-27T18:52:00.000-05:00

Dear Universe:

You gave me quite a scare earlier today. Thank you for the reminder of what's important in life and how grateful I really am for everything I have.

Most importantly, thank you for the happy ending.

Yours,
Miche

Today I Am Grateful

2011-11-09T14:24:00.003-05:00

that I found the nail in my tire, while I was safe in a parking lot

that I didn't have a flat tire on the highway

that I can afford an autoservice

that the gentleman the autoservice sent came quickly and was both personable and professional

Best Feedback Ever!

2011-11-06T09:12:00.001-05:00

wM: I can't wait until I'm a mom and can play with my child.

me: Why's that?

wM: Because it looks like you're having so much fun playing with me!

More Guilty Pleasures

2011-11-05T11:22:00.002-04:00

Again from "The Sing Off"

Hallowe'en opening number:

Dartmouth Aires -- Queen Medley:

Yellowjackets -- Billy Joel Medley:

YellowJackets -- The Sing-Off Exit Song:

The Moment

2011-10-01T14:24:00.002-04:00

I just had a moment, where I realized a friendship that I have in real life, doesn't match the parameters of the same friendship in my head. The reality isn't nearly as good as the internal impression.

It's always a bit disappointing when that happens.

It's liberating too.

Now I can move on, leaving my antiquated notions behind and living in the present.

Today I Am Grateful

2011-09-28T14:23:00.001-04:00

That the two police officers manning the speed trap were already occupied as I zipped past, perhaps a little over the limit.

Today I Am Grateful

2011-08-31T14:25:00.001-04:00

That when the coolant light went on in my car, it was in the morning and before I hit the main roads. Also thankful that the local service station was able to take me and check things out same day. Also happy that no major repairs were required.

Mostly grateful that I wasn't on the road with wM in tow at a point when things stopped working as they should.

Celebrate the wins!

Too Funny

2011-08-30T09:23:00.001-04:00

So the Blogger dashboard thinks that this blog is popular and I should try AdSense. Popular? Really?

Wow. Does this mean I'm finally one of the cool kids?

RBO: Unexpressed Anger

2011-08-28T09:28:00.004-04:00

In a perfect world, I would be able to let day-to-day irritations slide as per this Buddhist parable. Some days, however, it seems like I have a big basket of things I hold in my head. I'm hoping to put a bunch of them down here now, so I don't have to carry them anymore.

Why are there so many people out there with double standards? Why is it OK for you to do rude things to me but I have to be perfect and polite back or else you get snarky?

When I'm stopped at an intersection, with the sounds of an emergency vehicle blaring close by, it is NOT okay to lean on your horn expecting me to move, even if the light is green. Chances are I don't think it's safe. Oh, and it's the law.

When I've been a good friend to you by going with you to the movies (even when I don't feel like it), seeing a genre Q show (even though I don't generally like genre Q) with your favourite actor (even though I don't like him) when there are a bunch of other movies I would have rather seen, I don't much like it when I express an interest in a genre Q movie with one of my favourite actors (you say you don't like genre Q) and when I talk outloud about wondering whether or not I'm going to see the show in theatre or on DVD (without even asking you to see it with me), you state "you could just not see it."

Why is it okay for you to ask me for favours when you spent significant periods of time pretending I don't exist?

What gives you the right to insult my heritiage in from of wM? You have your issues with me, I know, but do not drag wM into it.

Thankfully these issues are not all from the same person.

Thank you for letting me unburden myself of them here.

Buried By Life

2011-08-16T11:15:00.001-04:00

How do other people get anything done?

The summer's more than half over and we've been sidetracked and waylaid at every turn!

Gack!

On Being Certain

2011-08-14T11:12:00.002-04:00

I haven't had a chance to read the book recommended in the last post's comments yet. However, I did skim some online reviews and let me say, that in itself lifted a tremendous burden!

Now when I hear people 110% confident about things where I'm sure I'm wrong, I just imagine that the certainty part of their brain is larger than the certainty part of my brain. It's just anatomy and has nothing to do with fact. Usually I just let it go ('cause I try not to be a right fighter if it doesn't really matter), but in the times where it bugs me, I feel much better about voicing my opinion and standing my ground.

And whether or not it is true, I'm going to apply the brain elasticity theory to the certainty part of my brain and see if I can grow it over time.

Wish me luck!

Missing Gene

2011-07-22T09:39:00.002-04:00

I'm missing a gene most other people have. It's the only possible explanation.

How else could it be that most other people can be so completely confident, even when they're wrong. How can they argue their position so vehemently? More importantly, why do I concede my position even when I know that I'm right?

Why do I walk around with this burden of multiple insecurities when so many people out there just approach life with the default position that they're right and competent. All. The. Time.

How do I get me some of that? (And as an aside, why do I let other people get to me so?)

Today I Am Grateful

2011-07-15T08:04:00.001-04:00

That wM is growing into a young person I like, in spite of my constant meddling.

Why Is It?

2011-06-15T06:55:00.001-04:00

That whenever I seriously consider shutting down my business, things pick up?

Today I Am Grateful

2011-06-03T13:20:00.001-04:00

That I was close to both home and a mechanic when my car started acting funny. And not on my way too or stuck at someplace much further away.

Things To Say To Bullies

2011-05-19T13:47:00.002-04:00

Dr. Phil teams up with American Girl author, Patti Criswell, to tackle the most important issues facing young ladies.

From DrPhil.com:

She gives examples of how young ladies can stand up to bullies. “There are
so many options. You can look at [bullies] and you could say, ‘That doesn’t
even make sense.’ You could say, ‘What are you doing?’ I like the one-word
technique, because sometimes girls get anxious when they try to stand up for
others. So think of one word you could say that could shut a bully down without
getting you in trouble ... You look at them very confused and say, ‘What?”
Or very bored and say, ‘Whatever.’ Or you could look at them and kind of nod and
say, ‘Wow.'"

“You want to rehearse these things,” Dr. Phil tells Miah. “Practice
it in the mirror. Practice it with your mom.”

No Deal

2011-04-30T19:23:00.002-04:00

They were willing to make some change to the major icky things, but didn't want to have to incur lawyer's fees to do so. (I was willing to take on 50% of the fee.) They said they had over 100 other people sign without issue.

I wonder whether or not I made mountains out of molehills. My lawyer, Mr. Miche and I all feel safer with me not signing. I don't think they were paying me enough anyway. I didn't stand to make a ton of cash from them overall, either.

Still ... icky.

Icky

2011-04-28T12:45:00.003-04:00

Why does standing up for myself always feel icky?

I'm supposed to do some short-term occasional contract work starting this weekend. The company has recently changed names and all the paper needs to be signed again. They've added a new document which raised some flags. I contacted a lawyer to review the doc. Lawyer said not to sign any of the docs as is and one needs a major overhaul.

Now I'm waiting to hear of the company even wants to consider these changes. And I'm going to ask if they'll split some of the legal fees or have me work without a contract. Or even if they still want me to come in on the weekend.

All I feel now is icky.

Things That Make Me Anxious

2011-03-27T10:10:00.002-04:00

In no particular order:

bed bugs (in places like transit, libraries, schools, restaurants, movie theatres)

the invasion of clutter that seems to be winning

thinking of parting with wM's baby things

making joint decisions involving large sums of monies to do things I'm not sure I want to do (I'm not sure I don't, I'm just not sure I do)

inability to keep up correspondence with friends

my inability to generate meaningful income (secondary to lack of marketing skills)

thinking about the future a smart (but less than motivated) 20 yo I know that hasn't finished high-school, had a job or done any volunteer work

aging family members

parenting

That feels better. Now if I can just keep them out of my brain and leave them in this post.

Dear Universe, WTF?

2011-03-02T12:34:00.002-05:00

Dear Universe,

I'm on to you. I see the pattern now. I start to let go of my anxieties around financial stability and then Mr. M losses his job. I start to feel happy about my place in life and a family member has a sudden onset health issue. I put down the mental burden of X with the faith that everything is going to be alright and you slap me across the the head with a brick.

Yes, I realize after the fact that the bricks didn't leave any permanent scarring damange. But they leave a helluva sting in the short term. You're toying with some serious operant conditioning patterns that are reinforcing my already-too-tight grip on anxieties.

Maybe we could chat about this over coffee one day instead.

Anxiously yours,
Me

PSA

2011-03-01T11:09:00.002-05:00

Dear Gentlemen:

When your hosting-averse significant other tells you point blank that she is exhausted and on the verge of completely losing it, it is not recommended to invite company over for a visit.

I'm just saying.

Yours,
Me

Good News Alert!

2011-02-18T16:59:00.002-05:00

It's official! There are NO new food allergies to report at the Miche household!

WOOT!

Now I can exhale.

Unfair

2011-02-06T11:15:00.002-05:00

Recently, a very caring and capable person in my community, was forced out of their job because they felt physically threatened by someone else in the community.

Our community is losing all of the positives and benefits of this person, because of one bad apple.

And there is nothing that anyone can do about it.

How can that be fair?

Ungrateful

2011-02-05T11:04:00.002-05:00

I've had frequent episodes of feeling ungrateful in the recent past. Feeling tremendous disappointment with outcomes of things into which I put a lot of thought and effort. Frustration with my inability to generate income. Hopelessness with the keeping up with chores. The futility of repeatedly throwing my body against proverbial brick walls. Instead of giving up, I keep doing the same things but with greater intensity.

It's not working. Big surprise.

While I spend the majority of my time cheefully and optimistically forging ahead, these episodes of feeling completely stuck really drag me down.

I know intellectually that perhaps, just a little, I'm trying too hard. Quite frankly, I don't know how to let go enough to decrease the magnitude. I know at the very least that I need to back off and relax about things. M'be stop trying all together. Not quite sure how to get there from here.

And then, with some effort, I need to remind myself to get my head out of my butt. That my problems are completely and utterly #FirstWorldProblems. I have a wonderful family and my health and food and shelter and clean water so quityerbitching already.

In a life with so much, how can it be so easy to loose focus and spend time and effort moaning and groussing?

Time to start focusing back on the gratitude.

Today

2011-01-22T10:04:00.001-05:00

Even if it's only for five minutes, I will believe in my own self-worth and not seek external validation of same.

It's Corny

2011-01-16T13:57:00.003-05:00

But the lyrics for the Bruno Mars song "Just The Way You Are" always make me think of wM as a baby. And I hope that as an adult, she finds someone she loves who feels the same way about her.

Oh her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And it's so, it's so
Sad to think she don't
see what I see

But every time she asks me
Do I look okay?
I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all
day if she'd let me
Her laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think it's so sexy

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
I'd never ask you to change
If perfect's what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

All Is Well That Ends Well

2011-01-13T12:10:00.001-05:00

Friend came to watch a class of wM's extracurricular. Turns out it isn't her cup of tea.

*phew*

Troubling Trouble

2011-01-05T14:02:00.002-05:00

Yes, I know the old adage about not troubling trouble 'til it troubles you. But I'm an anxious worrier. My mind races through the myriad of possible outcomes and fixates on the less than desirable ones. Yes, I'm working on letting that go. But until then....

My child is typically on the trailing end of the learning curve. Walking, talking, reading etc. On the curve, mind you, but wM tends to lag just a touch. Marching to the beat of her own drummer. She waits until she's good and ready thank. you. very. much.

Many of her friends, however, are truly gifted in one or more areas. A couple are reading 3 grade levels above what's expected. Some have perfect pitch. Some excel at math. Some are super athletic. It bums wM out when she notices the gap. We try to focus on individual accomplishment and less on comparison. "No matter how good you are at something, there will always be someone better and worse." It is important to me as a parent, however, that wM have something of her own in which she can excel.

Lucky for us, one of extracurricular physical activities that delights wM is something in which she is progressing slightly ahead of the curve. Go team wM!

Here's the sticking point. One of her closer friends (who excels markedly in a few areas) wishes to join wM in this extracurricular. wM seems happy with the idea that her friend will be in her class. But a little niggling part in the back of my brain can't help but be a little worried that her friend will eclipse her and take the shine off of the one thing that's been her's alone until now.

Can anyone out there tell me how to shut that part of the brain off?

Please?

Enjoyment In Lieu Of Resentment

2011-01-03T11:54:00.002-05:00

It came into focus for me, over the break, that my mindset has a habit of embracing resentment. in lieu of embracing enjoyment. I'd rather resent that someone broke the "no gift" rule than enjoy the generosity they offered me. I'd rather resent the time demanded of me than enjoy the moment of the companionship.

Granted, in some of those cases it would take me considerable effort to find the enjoyment. (For example in the situation where one is not particularly fond of one's companion.) For the most part, however, there is some low hanging enjoyment that I am capable of grasping.

While I continue last year's jouney of letting go, I will add to the list the idea of letting go of resentment to make room for accepting enjoyment.

Believe

2011-01-01T00:07:00.001-05:00

Magic is believing in yourself, if you can do that, you can make anything happen.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Wishing you the very best in 2011!

A Bloggy Year In Review

2010-12-31T10:43:00.001-05:00

[Filched from Dani at Postcards from the Mothership.]

The first sentence of the first post in each month this year. (And this year I'm actually doing the first sentence. Unlike in other years where I've misread the instructions and done post titles.)

2010 in bloggy review:

It wouldn't be New Year's without the meme of review in the form of the first line of the first post of each month in 2009.
By patching a pair of otherwise perfectly good jeans.
That I wasn't on the highway when the engine broke on my old car.
How to stop holding a grudge.
Because my character's surname was Damon.
Just because you drive an SUV and were running late, doesn't diminish my right to make a full stop at a stop sign to ensure my safety before I continued.
The audition went well.
It's been over 6 years since I've had more than 3 consecutive hours, child-free, in my own home.
I am grateful for my most recent audition experience.
While I'm pleased as punch when you offer me audition opportunities and short-term paid work contracts, I'm confused by your concomitant generosity with The Sick and especially The Laryngitis.
That when I went to fill my car tires up with air, that I followed someone who hadn't used up all of their paid time and I got to fill them up for free!
I've meant to get back here before now, really I have.

Today I Am Grateful

2010-12-30T08:51:00.002-05:00

That there was a strong glass windshield between me and the rock the truck wheels in front of me hurtled toward my face at some potentially fatal speed.

Otherwise, that would not have ended well.

Guilty Pleasures

2010-12-21T10:34:00.002-05:00

Will all the free time I've had on my hands lately (*cough* *cough*), I found myself hooked on Sing-Off. My favourite group, Street Corner Symphony finished second last night. Here they are doing two numbers I could listen to again and again....

Come On Eileen

Down on the Corner

Has It Really Been A Month?

2010-12-16T10:22:00.003-05:00

I've meant to get back here before now, really I have. (Those of you who know me IRL will be scratching your heads as to why I'm here doing this instead of everything else that is supposed to be getting done. Don't scratch too hard -- it's bad for your scalp.)

What's been on my mind:

I've said to the universe twice since my last post, "I'm happy to take money for doing something I like to do, but I WILL NOT RUSH AND STRESS MYSELF OUT TO DO SO. If that means I don't get the $$, then so be it." And the universe spake unto me, "Miche, just tell me when you can be ready and whether or not you accept personal cheques." Nice.
I'm behind on all things Christmas. And instead of staying up all night and trying to pull off a minor miracle, I'm just redefining how things will get done this year. Like no fancy baked good gifts for wM's teacher this year.
I'm grateful for my health and the health of my family and friends. No matter how dysfunctional and disjointed, I'd feel much worse about things if they weren't around. Sometimes I need to be reminded about that.
I'm not sure if I've given up on the acting dream, or whether I'm just letting it nap for a bit. Timing and schedules et al aren't aligning themselves in a way to make things possible. I thought I'd be more upset about it. I'm almost wondering whether or not it's time to let it go.
We may be hosting a new food allergy in this household. One of the biggies. More on that when things get medically confirmed.
I'm grateful for truck drivers who let me in front of them.
I'm grateful for car breaks that work.
I'm grateful that all the rain we had on the w/e wasn't snow.
I'm grateful that wM's school is awesome and so are all of the staff in their own way.
I'm grateful for a kitchen full of food, shelter to call our own and heat and running water.

And now, I must get on with life.

Progress

2010-11-17T10:01:00.003-05:00

One of my pet projects is to reduce the number of extra tasks I take on because I tend to "feel unworthy to the point of 'over achieving' just to feel like I'm earning my keep."

I've been doing this passively, by not taking on new things unless I'm absolutely invested in doing them and will gain some personal enjoyment or satisfaction from doing them. I've been figuratively sitting on my hands, lest they raise themselves involuntarily to take on new assignments.

This has been helpful in the sense that I'm only mildly overcommitted instead of being completely buried by outside commitments. However, by doing this I'm still not convincing myself that "I'm good enough as I am."

I've recently made baby steps towards that goal.

The head of a local non-profit where I volunteer some of my time, recently mentioned to me how completely swamped one of the key staff members is by his responsibilities. They casually mentioned how in years previous, some of the volunteers would step-up and help out a couple of hours a day. What a big help it would be, they indicated, if someone could help out with this responsibility even a few days a week.

Mentally, I took three steps back, lest someone thought I was stepping forward to take that on. Not only would that be a significant time commitment, but it would be doing work I wouldn't enjoy. Not one bit.

I took a deep breath and said as calmly and matter of factly as I could muster, "I can't make that kind of commitment."

Guess what?

The answer was accepted and not argued or debated! The organization head is still talking to me and friendly to me! My other, more minor contributions are still valued! I haven't been banned! The earth continues to spin on its axis!

Maybe, just maybe, I am good enough as I am.

Today I Am Grateful

2010-11-15T19:11:00.002-05:00

That there are people that stop by here and remind me of things about which to be grateful!

I am VERY grateful for sunshine in November!

Exasperated

2010-11-14T10:59:00.005-05:00

The other day, wM was playing with her friends, Cee and Dee.

[content deleted]

Needless to say, wM felt a tad put out.

Does this make sense to you?

Brain Dump

2010-11-13T07:42:00.006-05:00

For some time now, I've had a number of semi-complicated issues swirling around in my head. Waiting patiently for me to make the time to sift through them write them out here.

We all see how well that plan has worked.

So today I'll do a quick and dirty dump here and see where that takes me.

The progress on letting go has been very small, but not for lack of trying. I'm much more aware of the habits I'd like to change. But the actual real life change is still very small. Apparently you can't "white knuckle" letting go. Who knew?
In retrospect, when I wrote that I'm not happy, it was a stepping stone to me realizing that maybe I've never ever really been happy. I mean, I've certainly been as happy as I'm capable of being at this point. But even when I was a child, I'm not sure I ever let myself be as happy as wM is capable of being. I'd like to work on that. I expect I need to sort through much of the first point on my journey there.
I am very grateful that there are so many people at wM's school that want the best for her. But I get frustrated by well-intentioned off-handed comments or actions by the staff that mess things up for us here. For example, commenting that maybe wM should be bringing something different for school lunches. The upshot of that is, instead of having a grand total of THREE things wM is willing to take for lunch, now we only have TWO choices. Thanks.
I've been struggling with the green-eyed monster. It's funny, I can't think of anyone else's complete life that I'd prefer over mine. But it's very easy to see snatches of their lives about which I let myself become envious. Like the woman in the acting intensive I took a half-dozen years ago. The one who starred in a Canadian series and is now doing US shows like the CSI franchise. Or the double income families with disposable cash! I try really hard to focus on the things for which I am grateful -- because I know that I have more than my fair share. But it's so easy to get distracted and think that the grass is greener elsewhere.
I feel like a fraud in many areas of my life. I'm not up to date with the field I studied in college, so that I can't really be useful in that field. I've never been formally educated in the field for which I most recently earned income, so I'm not qualified there. The acting thing isn't working out so well either. (Which could be a whole other bullet about whether I'm self-sabotaging even during the audition application process or whether it is just getting prioritized low out of necessity.) I've stopped and started in a number of hobbies. Jack of all trades. MASTER OF NONE.
The feature length film I worked on back in 2006 is never going to see the light of day. I've recently seen audition notices from the production company. They're going to recast and re-shoot. They've tweaked the character parts, such that I'm not even eligible for auditioning. This is a good news / bad news thing. While I would have liked to have some footage from this for my reel, I'm a little relieved to be out of the project. It kinda sucks though to have to remove that from the old resume.
There's a mom at the school who is a self-centered, self-serving, thoughtless, insensitive person. I'm really tired of sharing air with her. I'm really tired of her being able to get away with all the crap that she does. She is wearing. me. down.

The worst part? I don't know why I let her. I don't know how to stop letting her. It would be much healthier for me if I could just let anything related to her slide off my back.

That's it for now.

Thanks for stopping by.

Today I Am Grateful

2010-11-08T12:59:00.002-05:00

That so far I've been home and able to pick up wM from school whenever the office calls and lets me know she's not feeling well.

Today I Am Grateful

2010-11-06T18:57:00.001-04:00

That when I went to fill my car tires up with air, that I followed someone who hadn't used up all of their paid time and I got to fill them up for free!

It Makes Sense

2010-10-23T19:01:00.002-04:00

But some days it's awfully hard.

He is a man of sense who does not grieve for what he has not, but rejoices
in what he has.
- Epictetus

[sound of phone ringing]

Me: Hello?

Casting agent: May I speak with Miche?

Me: Speaking.

CA: I've got an audition for you next Wednesday at 10am. Can you make it?

Me: I'll be there!

Thank you universe!

Dear Driver,

2010-06-01T15:34:00.002-04:00

Just because you drive an SUV and were running late, doesn't diminish my right to make a full stop at a stop sign to ensure my safety before I continued.

Signed,
Not Impressed

Dear Other Mom

2010-05-19T09:37:00.002-04:00

Dear Other Mom,

I know you have all sorts of fancy-pants education related to childhood. I know you have a really big heart and mean to help. But between you and me, I really resent it when you try and parent my kid.

Yeah, my kid doesn't always interact with your kid in the way that you think is appropriate. Newsflash. Your kid doesn't always interact with mine in a way I think is appropriate.

Is my kid perfect? Far from it. Are there areas we're working on? Actively. Ongoing. And we're slowly making progress.

Are you making progress with your kid's issues?

Leave me and my kid alone!

Signed,
Fed Up

Today I Am Grateful

2010-05-11T11:53:00.001-04:00

That wM and I can walk to a nearby vendor to buy organic fruit and veggies.

Hats Off To Mothers Who Work Outside Of The Home

2010-05-10T18:43:00.002-04:00

I had the good fortune to have an opportunity to get paid to do something I enjoy( outside of the home) for a few days. It was nice. Nice to earn a few extra dollars. Nice to feel like I'm contributing to society. Nice to be out of the house. By the time evening rolled around, I wasn't nearly as mentally or physically exhausted as I normally am. When I came home at the end of each day, I had infinitely more patience for wM than a typical day. For the first couple of days, it was lovely.

By the end of the third consecutive day, however, the 3 hour (1.5h each way) commute on public transit was starting to wear me down. Spending my lunch hour among people who shared very few common interests made me feel a little sad.

My heart, and my body apparently, belong in the home. Looking after wM. And even though the hours are long and the pay is lousy it's the best job in the world for me right now.

Hats off to all you moms out there who don't have the choice and are working outside of the home. I don't know how you manage to cram all the family stuff in, during the precious little time you have at the end of your work day. (Not to mention the running of the household, groceries, laundry and appointments.) Be sure to give yourself a well deserved pat on the back.

A Question Of Worth

2010-05-03T10:22:00.004-04:00

So here's my dilemna.

The acting gig, as stated, was for the function of an actor. (No surprise there.)

When I arrived on location, however, they decided that based on my educational background I would be doing things in addition to the acting, that they would normally have hired someone at a higher rate to do.

So.

How to ask for a raise. How to scale the pay. (I haven't done work in line with my education for many, many years and am somewhat rusty.) How to negotiate.

To do the above well, I need to believe in myself. To believe in my own worth.

The real question then, is do I?

They Must Be Reading My Blog

2010-05-02T22:21:00.001-04:00

Because my character's surname was Damon.

*snicker*

Got The Part!

2010-04-22T10:28:00.002-04:00

I got the part for which I recently audtioned.

Funny thing is, it's work that's going to be used to help students learn, how to learn, what I learned at school.

Needless to say, I'm grateful!

Yippee!

2010-04-17T19:23:00.000-04:00

Audition tomorrow!

It won't make me a star, but it's a paying gig!

*fingers crossed*

The Dream Is Alive

2010-04-15T09:27:00.003-04:00

Though it's not tended to as often as I'd like.

I submitted for auditions this week!

Dealing With Dangerous Dogs

2010-04-10T21:46:00.000-04:00

From the BBC News article, "How do you fend off a dangerous dog?"

No sudden movements
Put hands in pockets
Avoid eye contact
Back away but do not run away
Children can accidentally provoke a dog
Never try to break up two fighting dogs

Good to know.

Today I Am Grateful

2010-04-07T21:42:00.000-04:00

For having amazing neighbours.

Thanks guys!

How To

2010-04-05T09:37:00.002-04:00

How to stop holding a grudge. [from eHow.com]

Decide to move on. You expend more energy holding a grudge than you do letting one go. Make the choice to clear up the mental space occupied by this resentment. Once you choose to move on, the grudge will gradually dissipate.
Honor your feelings. Resentment builds when emotions go unacknowledged. Take the time to get clear about what you're feeling and why. Take action accordingly. If you have something that needs to be said, say it. If you have already voiced your grievance, then resolve any other feelings yourself.
Accept what is. Stop waiting for signs of remorse. Chances are the other person has already put the issue behind them. You may never get an apology, but that doesn't mean you should continue to indulge resentment. Be the bigger person and put the incident behind you.
Forgive. Forgiving someone doesn't exempting them from their actions. It doesn't change the facts. If you have been legitimately wronged, then forgiving doesn't mean you have to forget. It does mean that you acknowledge that the person is human and that we all make mistakes.
Shift your focus. Look at the good things about the person. Find the positive in the situation. Maybe you learned a lesson and discovered something new about yourself. Changing your viewpoint will help you release resentment.
Don't feed the monster. Once you've voiced your resentment and committed to moving on, don't continually talk about the offense. If you find yourself thinking about it, mentally change the subject. If someone brings it up, explain that it's in the past and you don't want to dwell on it.

Let's start the New Year by looking back at the old one, with some perspective!
That I remembered to bring the online receipt showing the photo order was prepaid, to the store when I picked up my photos.
That wM's childhood has been more enriched, more nurturing and more fun than mine was over the same timeframe.
That all this rain isn't snow!
Robin in the rain, such a saucy fellow.
AA refuses to return my calls.
Should you ever find yourself in a heated argument with a right fighter, do not utter the words "get out of here," unless you actually mean, "please leave this physical location."
For the people in my life who want me to be the best "me" I can be.
That I discovered I left my purse at home on my way in to the grocery store and not at the check out!
That a dry clean only wool sweater came out on the right side of a near miss with spilled chocolate milk.
I had the opportunity to try, fresh picked from the farm, organic vegetables at no cost to me.
Today I am holding a grudge against anyone in my life that can't seem to let go of theirs.

content deleted by author