Things That Make Me Anxious

In no particular order:

• bed bugs (in places like transit, libraries, schools, restaurants, movie theatres)


• the invasion of clutter that seems to be winning


• thinking of parting with wM's baby things


• making joint decisions involving large sums of monies to do things I'm not sure I want to do (I'm not sure I don't, I'm just not sure I do)


• inability to keep up correspondence with friends


• my inability to generate meaningful income (secondary to lack of marketing skills)


• thinking about the future a smart (but less than motivated) 20 yo I know that hasn't finished high-school, had a job or done any volunteer work


• aging family members


• parenting

That feels better. Now if I can just keep them out of my brain and leave them in this post.

Dear Universe, WTF?

Dear Universe,

I'm on to you. I see the pattern now. I start to let go of my anxieties around financial stability and then Mr. M losses his job. I start to feel happy about my place in life and a family member has a sudden onset health issue. I put down the mental burden of X with the faith that everything is going to be alright and you slap me across the the head with a brick.

Yes, I realize after the fact that the bricks didn't leave any permanent scarring damange. But they leave a helluva sting in the short term. You're toying with some serious operant conditioning patterns that are reinforcing my already-too-tight grip on anxieties.

Maybe we could chat about this over coffee one day instead.

Anxiously yours,
Me

PSA

Dear Gentlemen:

When your hosting-averse significant other tells you point blank that she is exhausted and on the verge of completely losing it, it is not recommended to invite company over for a visit.

I'm just saying.

Yours,
Me